I’ve always had this insanely thick, long hair since I can remember. My mother and father absolutely REFUSED to let me cut it – saying it would be a waste, because everyone who doesn’t have it, wants it. When I turned 24, I had a little nervous breakdown and buzzed it all off… I looked like Mrs. Potato head minus the plastic hair.
It. Was. Horrible.
I didn’t look in the mirror for around 3 months until it started growing, and even then I cringed at the sight. Some people can pull it off and look amazing doing so, but this Italian girl, cannot. I seriously looked like a big ol’ pile of steaming poo, and that my friends is somewhat insulting to that hot tempered feces.
Here’s a few downsides when having Sasquatch genetics –
- I cannot go in public without someone touching my hair. Even if I think I look like ran over cow dung, I still get random fingers in my hair, scalp touched, and then eventually it gets frizzy due to their fingers and palms being all up in my business.
- I wear the shit up ALL the time, which will contribute to my hair loss one day because of the weight of it. Which is, you know, amazing.
- I spend around 40-50 bucks a month on shampoo’s, conditioners, hair gel, anti-frizz creme, and hairspray. Which, again, is great because I don’t have anything better to spend what little money I have.
- If there ain’t central air, I ain’t goin’. Unless you wanna see a poodle with green eyes.
- I lose my hair just as fast as I grow it. I find it in the WEIRDEST places, and often clog the drain when showering… You’d think with all the hair I lose, I wouldn’t have this issue and I would have some paper-thin hair, but alas, I do not.
Now, don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying I don’t think my hair is beautiful, and wouldn’t have it any other way, but it can be a hassle and a half. My mother and I have the same exact hair, and she too knows this burden, and leaves it naturally curly like I do. I straighten it sometimes when I get a certain hair up my butt, but mainly I put it up, braid it or glob tons of gel and anti frizz serums THEN douse it in hairspray before I go anywhere… The outcome?